Who the F*%K am I?!

It's interesting how uncomfortable I am with success.  "Success" is this golden ticket I've been yearning for my whole life.  I don't have a clear vision of what success is for me other than I know I will feel damn good when I am successful!  Success to me is feeling like I have "it"; like I'm "there", and am just patiently waiting to be pleasantly surprised by the other "its" of life.  That may not make sense to you; maybe success to you is a certain figure in your bank account, or a certain lifestyle; it's OK that we have different meanings for success.  I think the deeper question is, do we really want to succeed?

The past few weeks has opened me up to a whole other level.  I feel like I am at the cusp of that allusive success I've been dreaming about.  Problem is, I'm terrified.  Instead of feeling like YES, IT'S ALMOST HERE, I'm like...OH SHIT!  UMMM, I DON'T THINK I CAN DO THIS.  I am so not ready for success.  Are we ever truly ready for it?  I see people I love quit on their dreams all of the time because they are afraid.  A lot of fears are rising to the surface for me.  I've actually turned down opportunities recently because of these fears.  I recently hired a Virtual Assistant to help me promote myself, among other things, and one of the first things he told me was that I need to put myself on Youtube.  WHAT?!  NO WAY!!!  Youtube is for people with actual talent (or lack thereof but have a gimmick), and I have neither.  I mean, do I?  Could I? Should I? What if I actually do have something of worth and value to share with the world?  What if opening myself up to the possibility of not hiding behind my laptop is the tipping point I need to take me to that level of success I've been wanting?

I think my biggest concern is that I don't feel like I'm "qualified" to give any advice. Just like the title of this post I think, "who the fuck am I" to be giving advice?  Who am I, really?  I don't have any fancy certifications or degrees to go next to my name, so what do I have to show you, to prove to you that I am worthy of your time.  I guess the answer is, I don't have anything to show you.  I don't really have to prove myself and my worth to you.  I'm a person that loves to share what I know, and loves to connect people to resources.  I love to show you what I did to break free from a destructive cycle; I love to share what resources I used to get my hustle on when I was broke; I love to discuss how changing my thoughts helped me connect more with my body and environment.  I guess all I can do is just share what I've learned and hope that it can help you somehow on your journey.  I hope and dream that I can be successful by sharing with you what's in my heart and helping you find your way.