I forgive myself for being fat

I follow a great deal of amazing teachers and healers, including Deepak Chopra, Sonia Choquette,

Mike Dooley, among others.  I receive daily messages of inspiration and compassion to help me on my journey, and I recently noticed within the last two months I've been receiving a lot of messages about forgiveness.  I read them but the messages didn't connected with me, so they get deleted.  I always thought, well I don't have anyone to forgive.  I thought of forgiveness as something you did when someone hurt you, when you want to release that toxic energy.  I never quite clicked with forgiveness, until now.

To back track a little bit, I noticed within the last 2-3 months, since I've been more serious about improving my health, my ego has been so negative and draining.  I find myself fighting constantly to remain positive, optimistic; to guide myself gently.  But the voice has become louder, more aggressive, berating; all around just putting me down and making me feel so low.  I get so low sometimes I don't even know how to continue.  Thankfully I've learned to just let things be and take a break when things get overwhelming.  I stop what I'm doing and enjoy stillness.  I'll take a walk or just lie down, to calm the voice in my head.  The more I try to fight, the worse it gets so I just let it be.  I let my Ego have a tantrum moment and then eventually it's over (at least momentarily).  I figure my ego is scared and feeling doubtful of progress.  She's so used to feeling like a failure that it's a natural tendency to prepare and plan to fail. 

So as I read one of the most recent posts about forgiveness it dawned on me so suddenly that the first person I need to forgive is myself.  I need to forgive myself for the negative thoughts, actions, and emotions that I've pretty much given to myself.  The first forgiveness action, which I think will help me with my weight loss, is to forgive myself for being fat.  I forgive myself for being hard on myself, for criticizing myself, for giving up on me, for seeing and treating myself like shit, for feeling guilty when I eat or even think of eating, for overeating, for craving junk foods, and the list goes on and on...I think what I'll do is write out a list of all the things in the "fat" category I need to release myself from and forgive myself for.  I think I'll create some kind of forgiveness ritual, maybe burning the paper I write on, and creating beautiful reminders to stay on the forgiveness train.

Let me know, what are some things you can forgive yourself for?

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